Showing posts with label Celebrities. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Celebrities. Show all posts

Saturday, 18 November 2017

Celebrity Week

This week's celebrity news:
  • Mo got his sirknighthoodship;
  • Mo got a big hat;
  • Some people you never heard of headed to the jungle;
  • Boris's dad went into the jungle;
  • the wrong one went into the jungle;
  • Leonardo sold one of his paintings for $450; 
  • Leonardo said ‘eeh that’s a lot of money for one of my paintings’; 
  • Leonardo said he wished he had done a few more n
  • paintings now; 
  • Michael and Boris are friends again; 
  • Boris must really want to be Prime Minister;
  • Theresa was in Gothenburg;
  • Theresa said she was clear ... very clear  ... about something or other;
  • Serena got married.

Saturday, 11 November 2017

Celebrity Week

This week's celebrity news:
  • Aston left Strictly;
  • Priti went to Africa; 
  • Priti came back from Africa sooner than she thought;
  • Theresa said 'I'll have no one left at this rate';
  • the Queen said 'eeh have I got that much money';
  • George got a new statue;
  • Louis said his jet wasn't really a jet it was a big car, a big car with wings;
  • Doddy was 90; 
  • Barak turned up for jury duty; 
  • Theresa said she was dead fed up; 
  • Conor went to a boxing match;
  • Conor was told he wasn't supposed to be at a boxing match;
  • Tom got a new chimney; and 
  • Ant and Dec went to Australia.

Saturday, 4 November 2017

Celebrity Week

This week's celebrity news:
  • Dec was disheveled;
  • Louis won some car race;
  • Prue told us who won the Bake off;
  • Robert got some grey hair;
  • Cheryl is going to do Strictly on Ice;
  • David fixed his freezer;
  • Victoria said can we not get a professional in, we have loads of money;
  • David said had she seen the prices they charge;
  • David and Victoria had a Halloween party; 
  • Victoria said ‘have you fixed that freezer yet’; 
  • Michael said he couldn’t be bothered being Secretary of State anymore; 
  • Julia said she didn’t like her legs being bandied around on the news; 
  • Alex is doing Strictly on Ice; 
  • Donald lost his Twitter account for eleven minutes;
  • the world had its best eleven minutes this year; and 
  • some people were on the Orient Express. 

Saturday, 28 October 2017

Celebrity Week

This week's celebrity news:
  • Harry went to Lancashire; 
  • Gareth got some new hair;
  • Bruno had a holiday in LA;
  • Bruno was tired;
  • Siobhan said she wasn't that fussed about Elizabeth;
  • Harry went to Copenhagen - Harry gets around;
  • Wayne got some trainers;
  • Wayne said 'who knew there were this many park benches in Liverpool;
  • Nick lost some of his listeners;
  • the Queen said she had been married nearly 70 years;
  • Philip said he thought it seemed longer;
  • Philip said 'Your mam never liked me';
  • the Queen said 'Our mam was right about you'; and
  • Olivia is going to play the Queen because Claire is fed up with it;
  • the Queen said she should try doing it for 70 years;
  • Philip said 'Not that again';
  • Simon fell down the stairs  and
  • Gemma fell through the floor.

Saturday, 21 October 2017

Celebrity Week

This week's celebrity news:
  • Theresa went on a surprise trip to Brussels with David;
  • David was surprised Theresa when turned up to go to Brussels with him;
  • David said 'you're not going to cough in my ear all the way there are you?';
  • Theresa and David had dinner with Michel and Jean-Claude;
  • Theresa asked who was paying the bill;
  • Theresa said she didn't have a pudding;
  • Cher is going to do Mamma Mia 2;
  • Ed fell off his bicycle;
  • Meghan met the Queen; 
  • the Queen said ‘Have you come far?’;  
  • Colleen went on holiday;
  • someone left Strictly; and
  • someone left the Apprentice as well; and
  • Angelina walked on a carpet.

Saturday, 14 October 2017

Celebrity Week

This week's celebrity news:
  • Some Welsh footballers decided they weren't going to go to Russia; 
  • Theresa said 'If one more person says "It's not the cough that carries you off, it's the coffin they carry you off in" I shall get really cross; 
  • the Queen went back to work after her summer holidays - eeh it's nearly Christmas and she just got back; 
  • Donald thought he would take an IQ test; 
  • Brooklyn had an ice cream; 
  • the Queen asked someone to check her purse to make sure she didn’t have any of the old pound coins left; 
  • Sting sold his house in New York; 
  • Ryan is going to do Neighbours;
  • someone left the Apprentice; and 
  • someone won't be doing Bake off anymore;
  • Gloria got an OBE off of the Queen;
  • the Queen said 'ooh I'm thinking of having a winter break can you recommend anywhere?'
  • Gloria said that was Judith; and
  • Nicole might be leaving X Factor.

Saturday, 7 October 2017

Celebrity Week

This week's celebrity news:
  • Theresa went to Manchester; 
  • Theresa said 'ooh is this the North, isn't it cold; 
  • Harry thought he would like to captain a football team; 
  • Tyson won't be boxing again; 
  • Theresa asked if anyone had a Fisherman's Friend; 
  • Amber told Boris to stand up and applaud; 
  • Melania wore sunglasses in the evening; 
  • Melania said ‘who put that tree there?’; 
  • some England footballers played football – they are always playing football; 
  • Boris is selling some trophies (not that Boris);
  • Some comedian you have never heard met some nice policemen at a conference;
  • Theresa said ‘What was that that just fell off of the wall’;
  • Wayne pained a park bench;
  • the Queen said it could be dead noisy at Windsor;
  • thw Queen said sometimes she could hardly hear herself think because of them airplanes;
  • Cheryl thought she might do X Factor again; and
  • Olly is going to do The Voice.

Saturday, 30 September 2017

Celebrity Week

This week's celebrity news:
  • Some famous people danced on the telly; 
  • Harry held a hand; 
  • Donald (not that Donald) went to Downing street for lunch with Theresa; 
  • Theresa wasn't expecting Doanld; 
  • Theresa said 'eeh I've nothing in we will have to send out for sandwiches, have you got two pounds'; 
  • Theresa was furious because she couldn't sell her airplanes; 
  • Donald said 'Only America First - to be fair he was quite clear about that; 
  • Some people who aren’t famous are going to become Apprentices; 
  • Bruce is going to do another Die Hard; 
  • Theresa went to Estonia; 
  • Theresa said ‘eeh I’ve never been to Estonia it’s dead like Russia; 
  • Henry thought he would quite like to be this week’s leader of UKIP;

Saturday, 23 September 2017

Celebrity Week

This week's celebrity news:
  • Some people got Emmys;
  • Wayne has had better weeks; 
  • Rio took up boxing;
  • Boris was in America;
  • Theresa was in America;
  • Theresa told Boris to get back to London;
  • Theresa and Boris got on the same flight to the UK;
  • Theresa said she was pleased they hadn't booked Ryanair;
  • Theresa went to Florence;
  • Harry went to Canada; 
  • Harry's girlfriend lives in Canada;
  • Michael said 'who's Gerald Ratner?';
  • after finding £1 billion down the back of the sofa Theresa found another e20 billion;
  • news just in - someone you have never heard of won celebrity MasterChef; and
  • Angela wants to be re-elected.

Saturday, 16 September 2017

Celebrity Week

This week's celebrity news:
  • Some people found out who they will be dancing with on Strictly;
  • some people found out they only had two weeks work;
  • Tomasz went to Tampa;
  • Tomasz got a new red over jacket;
  • Gigi lost a heel;
  • the Queen was given the first new £10 note;
  • the Queen put the first new £10 note in her handbag; 
  • the Queen said 'that will do nicely for the bookies this afternoon';
  • Madonna brought a new DVD out;
  • Theresa is planning a speech;
  • Boris decided to get in first;
  • Boris said 'now where did I put that bus'; and
  • 'Rooney party girl' is now a person. 

Saturday, 9 September 2017

Celebrity Week

This week's celebrity news:
  • George and Amal went to Venice;
  • the Queen said she was off to open a bridge;
  • Philip said he thought it looked nice and that they probably put on a good buffet so thought he might come with her;
  • the Queen said she thought he was doing that back fence before the winter set in;
  • Kate thought she would have another baby;
  • George had his first day at school; 
  • George thought ‘stuff this for a game of soldiers’; 
  • Wayne said Colleen shouldn’t have ten holidays a year; 
  • some people baked some biscuits;
  • Theresa said she wasn't a robot;
  • Theresa said she would exterminate anyone who said she was a robot;
  • Conor went on holiday to Ibiza;
  • Camilla named a ship HMS Prince of Wales;
  • Camilla said 'eeh that's what my husband is called';
  • Camilla said 'not my first husband I meant the one I have now'; and
  • Boris went to Estonia.

Saturday, 2 September 2017

Celebrity Week

This week's celebrity news:
  • Harvey went to Texas;
  • Donald said he would go to Texas;
  • Texas said 'haven't we suffered enough'; 
  • Theresa went to Japan;
  • Theresa thought she might get a new video recorder while she was in Japan;
  • George went to school;
  • some new people baked some cakes - it took ages because of all the adverts;
  • Some people did some boxing;
  • Theresa said she would quite like to be Prime Minister at the next election – that should be nice; 
  • Some footballers stopped being transferred; 
  • Mike said ‘I’m not buying any of those, they are dead expensive’; 
  • Wayne said ‘What’s that blue flashing light?’; 
  • Wayne said ‘eeh officer I’ve had a dead good night’: 
  • Wayne said ‘What you want me to blow in that bag for … are your chips hot … ha ha that always makes me laugh’; and 
  • Madonna moved to Lisbon. 

Saturday, 26 August 2017

Celebrity Week

This week's celebrity news:
  • the Queen said 'If you have nothing to do you can put up that shelf in the spare room;
  • the Queen said 'Did you put that shelf up?'
  • Philip said 'i didn't have time to get round to it, I've been busy with things';
  • The Queen said 'You were sitting in that chair when I went out first thing this morning;
  • Bradley is going to be a companion;
  • some people are going to start baking; and
  • some people are going to start boxing;
  • Mel has silver hair; 
  • Mark earned $68 million last year – what a  lot of money; 
  • Andrew isn’t going to do Sunday Politics anymore; and
  • Wayne isn't going to play for England again;
  • Harvey went to Texas;
  • Sarah had some booze after winning CBB - sorry that should say Boos; and
  • Jenna is going to be Victoria again; 

Saturday, 19 August 2017

Celebrity Week

This week's celebrity news:
  • Tom jumped off a building; 
  • Tom almost landed on another building; 
  • Tom said 'Ouch'; 
  • David built a castle; 
  • David said 'I've got three pieces left over'; 
  • Daniel said he thought he might quite like to be James again; 
  • Cheryl gets up an hour before her baby to do some online workouts; 
  • Cheryl does kick boxing or yoga in the afternoon when her baby is asleep; 
  • Cheryl obviously doesn’t do double shifts at Greggs; 
  • Tom broke his ankle; 
  • Tom is over 50 and shouldn’t be jumping off buildings; 
  • Leo and Kate went to St Tropez;
  • David and Victoria were in Malibu; 
  • Donald fired someone;
  • Donald said 'who can I fire next, I like doing this'; and
  • some more people are doing Strictly.

Saturday, 12 August 2017

Celebrity Week

This week's celebrity news:
  • some singer is going to do Strictly - must be that time of year again; and
  • Davood said he would do Strictly as well;
  • Philip has started his retirement;
  • the Queen said 'I hope your not going to sit around the house all day;
  • Liam got a new tattoo;
  • Philip said 'What you got on today then?'
  • Philip said 'That looks nice, i bet they do a nice lunch';
  • the Queen said 'if you have nothing to do that shelf in the front room wants looking at';
  • Cody ran about a bit; 
  • Anneka might be having another Challenge; 
  • Brad and Angelina might not be getting divorced; 
  • Jim did some paintings; 
  • Madame Tussauds said they wanted to make a stuffed dummy of Theresa - they are a bit late with that; 
  • some famous people had a fringe in Edinburgh; and
  • Donald got so angry his face went orange.

Saturday, 5 August 2017

Celebrity Week

This week's celebrity news:
  • Scaramucci got fandangoed;
  • some new bloke is going to edit Vogue;
  • Philip got a new bowler hat;
  • Philip got wet in the rain;
  • Philip said 'that hat's ruined';
  • Philip finally retired;
  • Philip said 'what's a Post Office?;
  • Philip said he didn't know how they were going to manage now with only one wage coming in;
  • some people went into the Celebrity Big Brother house - is that still on?;
  • Donald said it had been a good day at the White House;
  • Charles and Camilla went to Corfu;
  • Camilla said 'wasn't your dad born here?';
  • Philip and Holly - not that Philip - are going to present Strictly on Ice next year;
  • Danny is staying in EastEnders;
  • Mo won again; and 
  • Johnson-Thomson-Jackson-Stevenson-Carlson is going to do some running.

Saturday, 29 July 2017

Celebrity Week

This week's celebrity news:
  • Katie got a new face;
  • Justin isn't going to China;
  • Philip retired;
  • the Queen said 'oh god does that mean I am going to have him round the house all day?';
  • The Pope turned his fountains off; 
  • the Pope said his bath water was running much faster now them fountains were off; 
  • Adam won two world records; 
  • Daniel is going to be James again; 
  • Theresa went to Lake Garda on holiday – we know what happened the last time she went on holiday; 
  • Theresa wore a £25 dress from Next; 
  • Theresa said she got her new dress and a pair of espadrilles for £30; 
  • William isn’t going to fly his helicopter anymore; 
  • William is just going to do royaling from now on; 
  • Kate said ‘Is he going to be round the house all day’; 
  • the Queen said ‘tell me about it’.

Saturday, 22 July 2017

Celebrity Week

This week's celebrity news:
  • Camilla was 70;
  • William and Kate went to Poland;
  • Paul was trapped at a waterfall; 
  • loads of people got loads of money at the BBC; 
  • William and Kate went to Germany; 
  • Emmanuel said he was the boss; 
  • Dominic said David was ‘thick as mince’ – that’s quite thick; 
  • Vince thought he would like to be the leader of a political party; and
  • Jodie thought she would like to be a Dr;
  • Sean packed his job in - before he was sacked;
  • Gemma wore an orange tent;
  • Boris went to Tokyo;
  • David went to Brussels - they get all over don't they;
  • Camilla ate a scone the Devon way;
  • Charles said 'Do you have to have it like that can you not have it the Cornish way?;
  • Katie is going to do Dancing on Ice - not that one.. the orange one.

Saturday, 15 July 2017

Celebrity Week

This week's celebrity news:
  • Ernst got married; 
  • Wayne went to Everton;
  • Daniel is going to be James again;
  • Boris said he could hear whistling;
  • Michel said he could hear a clock - they must have ears like bats;
  • Letizia and Filipe came to the UK for a bit of a holiday; 
  • Filipe is 6' 4"
  • the Queen said 'eeh mind your tall';
  • Zsa Zas's will is missing;
  • Zsa Zsa's husband said 'I know I had it when I went to the shops';
  • Donald jr said after thinking about it he would have done it differently - there is a lot said that; while
  • Donald went to Paris;
  • Donald said 'eeh there's loads of French people here ... they are everywhere; and
  • some people are still playing tennis - but Andy is back to being Scottish again and Johanna is Australian again.

Saturday, 8 July 2017

Celebrity Week

This week's celebrity news:
  • the Queen wore a lemon dress - she's got loads of dresses;
  • some people cycled around in France;
  • Theresa went to Hamburg; 
  • Theresa said ‘eeh I never get a minute to myself’; 
  • Donald went to Poundland – sorry that should say Poland; 
  • Wayne bought a new house; 
  • Harry went to Leeds; 
  • a horse ate the Queen's flowers;
  • The Queen took her coat off; 
  • the Queen said ‘eeh it’s dead hot out today’; 
  • Mike said he was a power drinker – I think that means drunk; 
  • some people were still playing tennis – have they not finished yet?; 
  • Angela went to the G20 with a load of other people; and
  • Theresa went to a concert to watch an 1880s tribute band.